The people we work with can affect how we feel about our job because of our working relationships with them. First, we must remember not to allow the bad behavior of others to steal our peace of mind. We all know how hard it is to hold our tongue and remain mentally calm when we are irritated by other people. It is impossible for us to go through life saying to everyone that irritates or annoys us how to behave because tremendous resentment is created from unsolicited advice. Unless the people around you have asked for counsel one should not try to impose their beliefs or thoughts upon them.
The mistake made by novices is that the moment they feel inspired they try to change the whole work place with an all out revolution to convert everyone, but this type of eagerness arouses antagonism in the work place. No one wants to be told what to do when they are not seeking guidance; you must change your self first and others will be reformed by being an example of what you want them to be.
Who wants to have advice forced upon them? Put as much effort in the direction towards being a person who is looked up to and respected- that is what carries weight. As long as you demonstrate tension and nervousness around your co-workers, they will behave and react in a similar way. If you want to change the atmosphere at work, do not expect a change overnight, but by taking the initiative the natural process of change may come.
How can you expect to coexist with everybody? There can be a karmic explanation why we do not get along with certain people or some lesson to be taught or debt with that person. The fact that you have conflict with them suggests that you must be with that person to learn the faults in your character. If someone fights with his or her co-workers most of the time, it reveals that in a previous life they knew each other and established hatred in their hearts for each other.
They were probably archenemies. Therefore, according to the karmic laws of attraction and repulsion which involves hatred, the universe will bring the combating souls back together again in close proximity such as a small area in the workplace so they can engage themselves once again in the little arena. So be careful! Do not attract your enemy’s bad habits near you by constantly thinking about him through the conduit of hate. It is wise to keep your bad habits out of the work place, These types of character flaws should also be hidden from your co-workers to avoid unfavorable reactions.
The flaw of the human ego is Self pity. We cannot be objective if we have immersed ourselves in self-pity. If we harbor this attitude we will take everything personally and no one would dare approach someone who is extremely touchy. Being defensive prevents anyone from giving us constructive criticism. Wallowing in self-pity will cause us to constantly feel sorry for ourselves.
Self-justification is the twin sister of self-pity which urges us to always justify and defend our own behavior. So the next time you are confronted with wrong steps and faults, try to hold back and introspect. It is better to resist explaining yourself whenever you are confronted. That person could be right and is just trying to be helpful and true.
Beware of self-importance: “I had that idea, I did that or I did this.” When we attach to much importance to our accomplishments we develop a sense of false pride and in that moment you are headed for a fall. Self-condemnation is the opposite of self-importance and is just as self-destructive. Everyone makes mistakes so do not be so fast to condemn yourself.
When you are moody, sad or start going to pieces because you have been criticized by someone, realize that is one of your weaker links. Remember, we are tested in life in the areas where we have to develop and increase our inner strength. These circumstances will give us the opportunities for healing our psychological flaws and weaknesses in our minds and consciousness. Impatience or a lack of patience is a character flaw. A person who cannot exercise patience under stressful conditions is normal; all of us are guilty of this from time to time but this characteristic can be a real hurdle to overcome in getting along with others.
Don’t be so fast to condemn yourself; God does not care very much about our mistakes. He is only concerned about our desire to be better. It does not matter how justified we feel, if there is any hatred in our hearts towards anyone, realize that we will be tormented within ourselves until that hatred is overcome. The cousin of hatred is resentment, which is a natural reaction when we have been wronged or injured or when something said about us has been unfactual, distorted or twisted. Resentment, like hatred will also destroy your inner peace. If you allow yourself, even for a second, to be afflicted with resentment, in that moment you have lost your inner awareness.
Jealousy and envy is the result of a deep feeling of insecurity. If your co-worker is given something and you have been deliberately ignored, it is a life lesson to have any tendencies of envy brought up to the surface to be recognized and then removed. Keep your eyes focused on your own plate and not on others. You show the smallness in yourself.
Our environment is like a huge mixer into which is cast uncut diamonds, pebbles, chunks of rocks, rubes, emeralds which is then filled with a scrubbing solution; it spins, scrubs and buffs. After a period of time, the result is sparkling new stones. Within this environment we are all tossed in at the same time with our inadequacies, faults, weaknesses and limitations. Being scrubbed over and over peeling and scrapping off the bad temperament in each other to soften up our character so that someday we may all be refined and cultured people.